A private, fillable worksheet for a crossdresser and their partner to fill in together. Work through where, when, photos, overnights, who knows, and what happens if a child walks in. At the end you'll get a shared one-page agreement you can print or save. There's no score, and no right answers.
Completely private. Everything you type stays in this browser. Nothing is sent to us or anyone else. Answers disappear when you close the page unless you choose to remember them on this device.
Before you start, it helps to agree on what you're actually doing. These three words get mixed up, and the difference matters.
Says what I need, or what I will do, to feel safe. It's about me, not about controlling you.
"I'm not comfortable with photos online. If that changes for you, I need us to talk first."
A middle ground you both choose. Neither of you gets everything, and both of you can live with it.
"Not at home while the kids live here, but a studio visit once a month is okay."
A demand backed by a threat, meant to control the other person. It usually ends the conversation rather than starting one.
"Stop completely, or I'm leaving."
Sometimes a partner's honest answer really is "I can't live with this." That's a boundary too, and it deserves respect. But most couples find more room in the middle than they expected, especially once fear has calmed down.
Here's your shared agreement. Read it through together. If anything doesn't feel right, scroll up, change it, and create it again.
Keep it living. Feelings change, often a lot in the first year. Treat this as a draft you'll update, not a contract. If you keep getting stuck on the same topic, a counselor experienced with gender issues can help. See also our resources for partners, the Disclosure Script Workshop, and the Relationship Compass.
This worksheet is a communication tool, not therapy, legal advice, or a binding agreement. Nothing you enter is collected or stored by this website.
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